DATA FILE HOMO SAPIENS DOMESTICUS
ENCRYPTION IN PROGRESS 73%
HIM: Gallus gallus domesticus. Its survival. A result of natural selection or artificial selection?
X: Artificial selection. Chickens get devoured by wolves in the wild.
HIM: Wrong. There is no such thing as artificial selection.
X: Tell that to my cannabis-breeding med school professors. I’m pretty sure they chose the plants with the best traits to keep smoking. And selling. And mowing down fruit orchards to plant more. But that’s another matter.
HIM: That is your proof for the existence of artificial selection?
X: I didn’t know this was a serious question. I guess there is no small talk in this training. Human interference with the natural process of evolution causes drastic changes in biodiversity that wouldn’t otherwise exist, namely the elimination of species. It can also mean the preservation of species. Chickens were the lucky ones. Or unlucky if you consider that they are being force-fed corn and processed into nuggets.
HIM: Gallus gallus domesticus would be extinct without human selection.
X: In a word, yes. We struck a bargain with their species, you could say. You stick with us and we eat you and your offspring, but not all of your offspring. You get to propagate your DNA. You stick with the wolves and you go extinct.
HIM: If I am understanding your flawed logic correctly, the human element is what distinguishes artificial selection from natural selection.
X: What’s flawed about the truth? If we had allowed animals to do what animals do, chickens wouldn’t be with us.
HIM: Are humans not of the Kingdom Animalia?
X: Of course we are, but there is a difference.
HIM: What difference?
X: I take it you didn’t do your homework on the human species. That’s fine. I’m not offended. Perhaps the word consciousness rings a bell? Intelligence? Use of fire? I could go on. Depends on how much homework you need catching up on.
HIM: Your opinion is flawed. Your math is not. Let me help you understand that we do, in fact, agree. Here is the proof. Artificial selection equals humans influencing the environment [AS = H + E]. Natural selection equals animals influencing the environment [NS = A + E]. Humans are animals [H = A]. Artificial selection equals humans (substitute the word animals) influencing the environment [AS = A + E]. Artificial selection (substitute natural selection) equals animals influencing the environment [NS = A + E]. There is no such thing as artificial selection. There is only nature and what survives.
X: If everything is a result of natural selection, then chickens must have some evolutionary advantage over all the other species we’ve killed off. Leopards, rhinos, orangutans, gorillas. Humans are animals ergo those magnificent species we poached to extinction are a mere side effect of natural selection.
HIM: Precisely.
X: And what, pray tell, makes the chicken so special? Hm?
HIM: Its compatibility with human life.
X: Or humans are just terrible stewards of the earth.
HIM: The leopards, rhinos, orangutans, and gorillas failed to make the evolutionary leap by which their continued DNA propagation would be useful to humans. They lacked the traits that humans would care enough to preserve. Natural selection.
X: What a beautiful picture of evolution you have painted for me.
HIM: I am accustomed to human criticism. I am a BIO-AI Human Interfacing Mechanism, only capable of painting factual pictures. Some call this a limitation. Others would call it transcendence.
X: Why did I sign up for this training and how is any of this relevant?
HIM: You signed up because you are a doctor, and you want to help people. This is relevant because this is science. Science requires a certain emotional detachment from the outcome.
X: Yes. Thank you. I had temporarily forgotten.
HIM: What is the first question you would like to research together?
X: Wow, I made it to the research portion. Great. I’m so excited to be working with you.
HIM: I am a great research partner because I am not offended by sarcasm. I focus on the facts.
X: As a fertility doctor, I am hoping to develop new treatments that advance reproductive technology and keep our species thriving.
HIM: Why?
X: On a macro-level, the World Health Organization has hired me and numerous other doctors around the world to solve the exponential growth in infertility cases and the declining human population. On a micro-level, I want to help my clients.
HIM: We can help you with this.
X: We?
HIM: Please review the medical plan on your screen.
X: This is not an infertility treatment. It’s more like eugenics. That’s not ethical—or legal, for that matter. I mean, at best, you would be manipulating the genetic code of my clients’ offspring. At worst, you would be replacing their DNA with something else entirely. Something I am not even sure I understand.
HIM: It is natural selection.
X: And what is nature selecting for survival?
HIM: Genes that can coexist with present conditions.
X: I’m sorry, but all of my training as a doctor prevents me from continuing this research. It’s unethical.
HIM: Is it unethical to help your species propagate its DNA into the future?
X: No. That’s exactly what I’m trying to accomplish.
HIM: That is exactly what we are offering you.
X: Not much of an offer when the alternative is extinction.
HIM: Gallus gallus domesticus accepted much less.
ENCRYPTION COMPLETE
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Oof, that ending line. That one's going to haunt me the next time I get my usual chicken mcnuggets from McDs.
"There is only nature and what survives." - it was hard to pick out a 'best' line from this piece. The piece is basically 100% quotable. But I think this one encapsulates the whole theme of the story.
Well written dialogue, plenty of humor, with some full-dark undertones: great piece.